I have been exploring the area of my solar plexus since a little before Christmas. On Christmas eve I began having nausea and then cramping for about 3 weeks. I did a medicine journey and during it was feeling myself surrendering into the pain and nauseousness. Those feelings have dissipated since for the most part but are occasionally there.
In my meditation this morning I was feeling into sensations in my solar plexus which also had a thread up to the back of my heart. I was looking for the point at which these sensations began but couldn’t find it. I tried to make the locations my whole body but they stayed pretty local to where they are. I checked for where I felt calm and still in relation to my body and I could feel it heaviest along my back but it was throughout. When I was checking for “who or what” is experiencing these sensations in my solar plexus region those areas just highlighted, the sensations became stronger.
I decided to try and connect to my higher self by just asking it to come through and connect to me, the one having this experience. I asked for it to show me the point or the beginning of these sensations. I realized before even really waiting to see what came up, I asked Archangel Raphael to please show me what is happening in my solar plexus.
I then began to see a tall figure in a long brown cloak with a blacked out face. It was hovering in front of me up to my left looking down into my solar plexus. At first I asked if this was Raphael and didn’t get a response and it felt as if it was not him.
I then felt into whether or not if felt separate from ‘me’ and it did. None of the sensations had changed in my body as I kept checking while this was occurring. I asked the cloaked figure why it was looking into my solar plexus and what was it doing or trying to show me. I received the word control.
I said, are you controlling something related to my solar plexus? It was silent and still, staring at that area in my body. I felt into control and my body. Am I being controlled? Who is controlling? Am I trying to control?
In the beginning of my meditation I was having a lot of thoughts and distractions. I had asked who is the one having all these thoughts. It was the one who likes to plan. When I followed that trail I found a deeper sense of I, the one who wants or needs to ‘know’. I felt this I in my lower belly. I had been holding that I with the sensations I was feeling and stillness. At some point the sensations in my solar plexus really wanted my attention so that is when I focused back on those that lead to the experience above.
As I was feeling into control and what what happening I realized it was related to the Identity that “needs to know.” So I really allowed myself to feel what it’s like to need to know and the sense of control or will that is driving that action. As I allowed that to fill all of me I could feel a sense of me that is controlling and a sense of something else controlling. I held those in my awareness along with stillness and the sensations in my body.
I eventually came to a place where my body felt calm and tranquil. I checked in to see if the cloaked figure was still there and it was but it was much further away. I wasn’t afraid of it. It had an energy that at times felt neutral and at times a bit dark. In that moment as I saw it more in the distance I told it that I loved it and said we are all one. I could feel myself sending it love and as I did it moved further away. As I write this I can see if clearly in the space it was when it first appeared but it feels now like a vision or a memory.
For some reason I found myself asking my higher self and Archangel Raphael to fill my solar plexus with pure love and light. As I did I could feel it start to radiate through my body and a sense of peace fell over me.
I get the sense there is still more to work with around ‘control’ and who and what is doing the controlling but the meditation definitely came to a completion and I felt ready to make some notes and move into my day.Posted on January 29, 2018 by Keli · 0 comments